Fake Friendly Fridays is a section where we pick a famous personality and throw fake questions at him/her and in return, we receive fake answers. Why should you not take it seriously? Because it is fake.
If you still didn’t get it: This is a fake interview written purely on the basis of the author’s imagination of how the actual interview would have been if we got the chance to interview these famous (some, for all the wrong reasons) personalities in real life. In short, just have a good laugh!
ED Times: Today, we have with us a very honorable guest. He is a hero whose status is considered equivalent to God’s.
Oh, you all probably won’t get it since in India he is apparently the biggest enemy. Please give it up for Doctor XYZ.
(Audience starts booing instead)
Doctor (comes wearing an iron suit instead of a PPE Kit): Hey, how are you? Have you got your jab yet?
ED: God knows I have tried. It is a question better suited for the government whether they have procured enough doses for us yet. But thank you for asking. May I ask why you come wearing this heavy iron suit?
Doctor: By all means, I should be wearing a PPE kit, but the present condition has made me believe that coronavirus is kinder than the general public. I may have a chance of making it out alive if I contract COVID, but if the furious relatives of a deceased patient get a hold of me. Jeez!
ED: I apologize on behalf of every civilian who has wronged you. This atrocity against doctors is nerve-wracking.
Doctor: Only if every single Indian thought that way. On one hand, they banged utensils and clapped last year to boost our morale. On the other, they beat us to a pulp if their kin passes away as if we deliberately deprived them of any necessary medical treatment.
ED: How do you find the courage to go to work every single day knowing full well that you may be the victim of violence if something goes haywire? Don’t you feel angry, wanting to let people be?
Doctor: Not everyone is evil, right? Yes, the probability of violence is high in the current scenario, but right now, our services are needed the most. We worked hard and studied for several years to serve humankind in a situation like this one.
Courage comes when you know there are hundreds of people who are holding out all their hopes on you.
ED (almost welling up at such a kind answer): Apart from the violence, what are some challenges that you have to go through?
Doctor: There are several things. For starters, some people, no names taken, are claiming that medical science is “stupid”. I want to ask them if it indeed is stupid, then why has your non-stupid method not been able to find a promising cure for COVID.
Such baseless claims result in public distrust and destabilize equilibrium. At a time when we all need to stand together to battle the virus, it causes imbalance and disruption.
ED: If it helps, Nepal recently decided against procuring Coronil kits because they found that its components may not be as effective against COVID as claimed. Look how the tables have turned!
Doctor: Unfortunate for them. Do they need a Burnol, or does Yoga treat burns also?
(Audience hoots at this savage reply, so do I)
Doctor: It is one of the problems. There are others like the non-availability of oxygen cylinders, hospital beds, medicines. Thankfully as the second wave descents and governments step up action, this issue has been dealt with.
Witnessing deaths in hundreds has not been easy either. It takes a toll on our mental health. However much we try to emotionally alienate ourselves from them, the grief envelopes us when we break the news to their family.
We have seen families breaking apart, people begging for ventilators, and being helpless in such situations. We didn’t see our families and kids for days at length and worked an odd number of hours to save lives.
All we expect in return is kindness and gratitude. Is it really too much to ask for?
The audience stands up. I stand up. The nation stands up. To honor the frontline workers who have been working tirelessly for us.
ED: Thank you so much for taking out time for this interview today. I am beyond grateful and feel humbled to have conversed with you. May I get an autograph?
Doctor: Yes, sure! Thank you for having me. (Doctor signs the paper I give and takes a leave)
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This post is tagged under: doctor, interviewing a doctor, baba ramdev, allopathy, homeopathy, ayurveda, public violence, coronil, pandemic, covid-19, coronavirus, second wave of covid in India, shortage of vaccines, covaxin, covishield, shortage of beds, patients dying, mental health of doctors, front-line health workers, respect doctors, stop violence against doctors,