By Mallika Bhagat
As if the time zones and the world fighting wars over boundaries wasn’t enough, we now have these ghastly and often heart-wrenching areas called FRIEND zones!
Its like being stuck between a nucleur blast and a black hole. End is certain.
What’s even more bothering is that often we have no idea which end of the rope we are at! Choosing between keeping your friendship or expressing your feelings, my friends, is a task of no less maginitude than that of choosing a red or blue wire of a live bomb. You never know which one can blow up your world!
Yet,all things being said, there is always a solution to exit that treacherous zone with ease, without putting anything at stake!
These easy steps will help you Make the transition between friendship and relationship, a smooth ride!
1. The first step is to analyse the situation.
Never approach a person who is in a relationship,or is nursing a broken heart. These situations are often seen to be accompanied by a big bright No entry clause attached to it. Also if they are unsure of their feeling for someone, don’t burden them with your feelings either! That’ll make them ever more confused! It looks like you are trying to seize the opportunity. Give them space to decide in their life and then, if you feel that it’s a good time, go for it!
2. Look for the little signs.
We often do little things for the one we love to show our feelings and concern. If your conversations with this Special friend often look like a date, then there may be some scope for a future with “more than friends” aspect. Talking with a lot of physical touching is also a sign of comfort and attachment. Another way is to see the “Embrace-o-meter”(that’s a tried and tested method of my own device!:p) Hugs that last long,as in longer than usual, are indicators of a growing intimacy and affection. You could also use hugs to bring across your feelings. If the person responds with equal enthusiasm…I can already hear Wedding bells!
3. Be strong
Not “I am Popeye the sailor and I’ll break the bones of anyone who will hurt you” strong, but “I’ll be here for you, as long as you want” strong. We all want someone reliable. Be that wall she or he can lean on, emotionally. Being the emotional support is the first building block of a friendship that will blossom into a beautiful Forever. Promise yourself that no matter what, you would not let anything spoil your friendship. Only when you have decided this can you go back to being friends, even after the Big Reveal!
4. We all need Hints….
It is safer to check whether the person you intend to ask out is Actually interested In you or not. Go with statements like” had I been in your boyfriend’s/girlfriend’s place, I would treat you like this or that…” And wait for the response. If your interest shrugs it off as a joke, you definitely need to stay on this safer side of the water and back off a little. But if they wait for a while, and analyse the situation in their head,
Woohoo,you might’ve just hit the jackpot! You can take it forward from here with Little hints that’ll make them go, “Voila! You are perfect for me!”
5. If the friend you like is not involved with anyone else, the easiest way to exit the friend zone is Direct approach.
We all appreciate people who come and talk us directly. Pick out the perfect day to express your love. NO TEXTS OR PHONE CONVERSATIONS! there is nothing more immature than love that travels through the phone lines! And moreover,your words and intentions could be misinterpreted, and you would be left hanging, anxiously, waiting for the perfect response that would never come! Also choose the perfect time! You wouldn’t want to confess your feelings in an inebriated condition with dozens of people watching! Worse being that you are denied, having spoiled what’s left of your friendship. So choose a time when you two are alone and in your comfort zones.
And remember, we are haunted by things we never said. So say, before your love hands you an invitation to their wedding.:D
No day is better than today.:)
