Breakfast Babble: The Group Chats That Never Die, But Never Get Used Either

Breakfast Babble is ED’s own little space on the interwebs where we gather to discuss ideas and get pumped up (or not) for the day. We judge things, too. Sometimes. Always. Whatever, call it catharsis and join in, people.

I currently have at least ten WhatsApp groups that serve absolutely no purpose. And yet, I will go to my grave defending their right to exist.

Take the family group. Every single morning, without fail, some uncle posts a good morning message, folded hands emoji, sunrise photo, the works. 

Then, pin-drop silence. Nobody replies. Half the time, nobody even opens it. But god forbid you mute it and forget to unmute for a family emergency.

Then there’s the schoolmates group, usually named something like “School Friends Forever”. It’s frozen in time, and the profile picture is still the one from our farewell party. This one runs on a strict annual schedule. Total silence for eleven months, then absolute chaos every time it’s someone’s birthday. Fifty “Happy birthday, bro!!” messages in forty minutes, followed by one person asking, “Who’s this again?” Then it’s back to hibernation like nothing happened.

The cousins’ group is somehow both the most active and least useful. Someone posts a random photo from 2019. Someone else reacts with a heart. That’s it. That’s the whole update for the week. Somehow, everyone has seen it, nobody has anything to say, and the group survives another seven days.

And then there’s the office group, where everyone religiously reacts with a thumbs up to every message because nobody wants to be the one who accidentally starts a conversation.

Read more: Breakfast Babble: Why I’m Never The Funny Friend In The Group

And don’t even get me started on “Mama Ke Ghar Wale” or “Tuition Wale Din”, groups that exist purely because deleting them feels like a personal betrayal to people I haven’t spoken to since 2015.

Here’s the thing, you cannot leave these groups. You cannot. People will notice. People will ask. My aunty, bless her, called me last week to ask why I hadn’t replied to a good morning message from four days ago. She didn’t ask how I was doing. She called to enquire about the good morning message.

So instead, we all just quietly sit there. Notifications on, just in case. Never replying, never leaving, occasionally reacting with a thumbs up so people know we’re still alive.

These groups are like apps you never open but refuse to uninstall. They take up space, you’ll probably never use them, but deleting them somehow feels risky.

Maybe one day I’ll have the courage to leave one of those old college groups I haven’t opened since the actual batch graduated. But probably not. Because knowing my luck, the one day I leave, someone will finally post something important. 

Or worse, someone will say, “Arre, she left the group,” and suddenly I’ll be the biggest scandal of the week, despite never having said a single word in it.

Sources: Blogger’s own opinion

Find the blogger: @diptisadh

This post is tagged under: breakfast babble, WhatsApp groups, group chats, family WhatsApp groups, school friends WhatsApp groups, cousins group, social media, office WhatsApp groups, digital habits, relatable lifestyle, indian families, everyday life, WhatsApp culture