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Almost every Indian, if not all, dream of settling abroad owing to the beauty of nature, high employment rates and a luxurious life that other countries promise. One would think that living in a foreign developed environment would help stimulate personal as well as mental growth but, in my experience, such is not always the case.

Disappointing as it may be, some Indians regardless of staying abroad for years possess a rather orthodox mentality and are proud to preach about it.

“Why Is There A Boy In Your House In The Absence Of Your Parents?”

So back when I was in high school, I was a tutor and taught Psychology. A boy who was in class 11 would come over to my house twice a week in the morning. Now, mind you my parents have jobs and are well aware that I teach a boy of class 11 in the morning.

I live in a flat on the 3rd floor and the one beneath us is occupied by a man who worked in the USA for 10 years. One fine day, he caught my father strolling on the terrace and his exact words were, “Your daughter is quite young to be teaching a boy who is barely 2 years younger than her and that too alone.” My father shut him up saying that I was doing my job and they supported it.


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One would think that would shut him up but no. He began questioning me one day while I was going to college regarding who the boy was and what was my “relation” to him. Every time my student would arrive; he would keep peeking through his eye hole and would make up some excuse or the other to come to my house.

At times if by sheer dumb luck, he found the door unlocked, he would barge right in with the hope of catching us “red-handed.”

“Women Who Smoke Or Drink Are Bad People”

This statement came from a 24-year-old guy who studied in Paris for 2 years. Not only is he racist, but also sexist, misogynistic and a messiah of patriarchy.

I had made the mistake of asking him whether he would watch Alia Bhatt’s latest movie – Gangubai Kathiawadi to which his answer was and I quote, “Are you mad? Who is going to waste money on watching a movie about a prostitute?”

I wish it stopped there. But no. We were discussing how human beings should not be judged based on their religion when he said, “Muslims will forever be evil. Do you ever see them with folded hands in Durga Puja?” I was stupefied. How could a person reduce another human being’s existence to merely folding of hands during Durga Puja?

To conclude, living abroad does not necessarily mean that people will miraculously become more aware, open-minded and non-judgmental.


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This article is tagged under: misogyny, sexism, racism, Indian neighbors, nosy neighbors, living abroad, orthodox mind-set, boy and girl alone, student, teacher, psychology

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