Have you ever seen a man without any emotions on his face, sometimes pretending to smile and sometimes suddenly turning angry? That’s a man after a breakup, and men usually tend to be hard on themselves after a breakup.
So to all young men out there, these are some things, to start with, that you should do to move on and feel better after a bad breakup.
Talk To Your Friends
It is natural that after a breakup, one tends to be in isolation and cry things out. But it is really helpful to talk to friends and if you want to cry, better cry in their presence.
Sometimes it is really comforting to have a shoulder to cry on or someone who won’t give you advice and will just listen to what you have to say.
Friends will also try to cheer you up and make you laugh reminding you of old times. And probably you spent more time with your girlfriend than with your friends the time you were dating. Now’s the time to bring back the old you and spend more time with friends.
I lived a lie for 8 months, and I when I got to know about how badly I was betrayed, a rage of violence was in me. My friends held me back, took me to a movie, planned a dart board game with her picture in the center and trust me, that violent side of me never came out. They even saw me shed tears a little, bore my anger and frustration and did not say a word.
Don’t Switch To Friendship With Your Ex Right Away
An emotional distance is one of the most important things to maintain with your ex in order to move on and remain mentally stable. Keep the conversations semi-formal and do not go crying to her about how much you miss her.
This is probably one big mistake I did. I told my ex I was there for her and that I’d love to remain friends with her. But that just kept making me think of her more. It would be better not to make that move unless you are strong enough to handle your emotional inclination towards her.
You might have good intentions about being friends with her, but that is just the side of you attached to her memories that is telling you to stay attached. Maintain a little distance for a while and if you wish to, block her on social media.
Get In Shape
This is not for those who regularly workout, but for most of you after a breakup, you tend to eat crappy food and not exercise. If that is the case, it would be wise for you to hit the gym again.
I had left kickboxing but I got back to it after I broke up, almost after 4 years. It helped me a lot in terms of satisfying my mind filled with anger and calmed me down.
It might help you too. I’ve seen this strategy bring back life into depressed guys after a breakup. Working out really is a man’s solace.
Put Away The Photographs
Physical memories, especially photographs or mugs will give you a lot of grief. It is better to keep those photographs away in a shelf or in boxes you would not generally use in daily life.
It is good to have minimum things around you that will make you remember her. If you’re too angry, you might even want to tear, burn or flush those pictures – do anything that helps to make you feel better.
Believe me when I say this works out a lot. I had sketched portraits of her, and I burned them all. It helps you when you don’t see her face again and again.
Distract Yourself With Work
It always proves good to start working again if you have taken a break to move on. Indulging in learning a new skill will distract your brain and help you keep away from her memories.
Its been three months since I broke up and I’ve learnt 4 new coding languages, designed 8 web pages, written 30 articles and I hardly get to think of her the entire because I’m busy as hell.
I’ve found this particularly effective for myself and many fresh graduates and college students. Work really takes your mind off your ex’s memories and gives you something else to think of.
Maybe you should even try dating again, but that is only when you are confident enough you won’t take her name or cry about missing her in front of your new date.
Take time and try these things, you might soon feel the change. If there are other things that can help young men move on after a breakup, please do share in the comments!
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