Breakfast Babble is ED’s own little space on the interwebs where we gather to discuss ideas and get pumped up (or not) for the day. We judge things too. Sometimes. Always. Whatever, call it catharsis and join in people.
I must confess something today that may make me sound like a bit of an oddball (but who isn’t in their own quirky way?). You see, I have a guilty pleasure, one that I indulge in secretly and with a grin that only a conspiracy theorist would understand. Yes, you guessed it – I love reading conspiracy theories!
Now, before you raise your eyebrows and judge me as if I’m unravelling a secret government plot right here, let me assure you that I’m in it purely for entertainment value. Indian conspiracy theories are like the masala (spices) in my life’s daily curry, and they never fail to add a dash of absurdity that leaves me chuckling. So, let’s dive into the rabbit hole, shall we?
You know you’re in for a wild ride when you stumble upon conspiracy theories connecting the humble roti (Indian flatbread) to secret government plans. According to some theorists, rotis are the ultimate mind-control devices, secretly implanted with nanochips. I guess that’s one way to keep the masses well-fed!
Move over, chemtrails! In India, we have “chai-trails.” Yes, that’s right – there are claims that the steam rising from our beloved cups of chai (tea) contains hidden messages from extraterrestrial beings. I don’t know about you, but I’m starting to think that aliens have fantastic taste in beverages.
Forget the illuminati – in India, it’s the “Bolly-nati.” Some theorists believe that the Indian film industry, Bollywood, is a front for a shadowy organization controlling the world. I can’t help but imagine Shah Rukh Khan and Deepika Padukone leading the charge, with dance numbers, of course.
Apparently, those missing socks from the laundry aren’t lost at all. They’ve travelled back in time! Some conspiracy theorists insist that washing machines are secret time machines that transport your socks to different eras. I guess that explains why my sock drawer looks like a museum of fashion history.
In all seriousness, my love for reading Indian conspiracy theories is purely for the comedic relief they provide. They remind me that sometimes, a good laugh is all you need to break away from the everyday grind. So, while I’ll continue to savour my guilty pleasure of delving into these wild and wacky theories, I won’t be expecting any mind-controlled rotis for dinner anytime soon.
Remember, it’s essential to take these theories with a pinch of salt (preferably the one that isn’t secretly controlling your mind). After all, life is too short not to enjoy the occasional serving of outlandish stories, and reading conspiracy theories is the most delicious spoonful of absurdity I could ever ask for. Stay weird, stay curious, and always keep an eye on your chai’s steam signals – you never know what messages you might find in your teacup!
Feature image designed by Saudamini Seth
Sources: Blogger’s own opinions
Find the blogger: Katyayani Joshi
This post is tagged under: conspiracy theories, Illuminati, Bollywood, tea, chapatis, reading conspiracy theories, entertainment, Shahrukh Khan, Deepika Padukone, dance numbers, time travel, socks, outlandish stories, comedic relief
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