Disclaimer: Originally published in July 2018. It is being republished since it still remains an interesting topic till today.
In the world of parent-child relationships, children are evidently very dependent on their parents. But after a certain age, kids want to be left alone, they want to go out and explore on their own and make their own decisions.
In such scenarios, it is the parents who have greater trouble in letting their kids be independent. However, the new millennial generation is overtly more dependent on their parents.
THE DAILY TOIL OF ‘WASH YOUR HANDS AT LEAST’
This increasing dependence on parents perhaps stems from laziness. There is an incessant need to be told what to do.
The average millennial needs to be told the same thing umpteen times for it to be done. Right from washing their hands before a meal to charging their phones at night, all has to be told to them.
THE OVER INDULGENT PARENT
The millennial generation kind of has it easy. Usually coming from privileged backgrounds, kids nowadays are given everything on a platter.
Flashing around their iPhones, credit cards and swanky cars, parents continue to overindulge their kids under the garb of ‘making their lives easier’.
But this only makes it harder for their children to face reality.
THE IDEA OF OVERSHARING
Our parents come from a generation where compulsive lying to parents was the norm. However, the millennial generation is quite open about experiences.
Letting parents know of their whereabouts, the constant check through social media and blurring of boundaries between children and parents has resulted in this over-dependence.
Information on dating, drinking, partying is now readily available to the millennial parent and doesn’t need to be extracted.
THE REALISATION THAT INDEPENDENCE IS A STRUGGLE
Living at home might come with some restrictions like abiding by time, but there is a realisation that there is no place like home. Children who have stayed in hostels or alone at any point in time, realise that with independence comes great responsibility to take care of themselves and their needs. Home is where everyone is pampered and things are done for them.
COMFORT OF THE FAMILIAR
One reason for this dependence could also be the idea of ‘familiarity‘. Home is a space which is known to us. Our parents know us inside out, our likes and dislikes.
Our homes are the safest places to be at. Letting go of that safety net automatically rids us of that comfort of the familiar.
FEAR OF ‘ADULTING’
One of the most common terms used to describe what the millennial generation is doing is ‘adulting‘. The word essentially means to behave more like an ‘adult‘ with actual grown-up responsibilities.
However, there is an underlying fear in the minds of the millennials to carry out ‘adulting‘. The very thought of having to face real-world problems and multitask seems daunting. Dependency on parents, cures us of that fear, even if it is done temporarily.
THE TAKEN-FOR-GRANTED PARENT
Overprotective parents display a trait of being a part of every aspect of the child’s life. This overprotectiveness makes the child more and more dependent on the parent.
If the parent restricts the child from fighting his/her own battles and is available at every beck and call, the parent is taken for granted and only makes it harder for the child to be more independent in the future.
Belonging to this very millennial generation, I relate to all the things I stated above. I want the ‘independent’ experience as much as the next person, but within the comfort of my current life, where real struggles haven’t yet surfaced.
I too am dependent on my parents for just about everything. I have to be told repeatedly to apply cream after a shower, to keep my clothes properly stacked and to clean my spectacles periodically.
It’s not like I don’t know that I have to do all these things, it’s just easier when someone else has to remind us to do what we have to. Who better to do that, than our parents?
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