Statutory Warning: This article is written with malice in order to defame New Year Resolution. Proceed further only if you have a sense of humour. Read at your own risk.
So it is that time of the year when we decide our New Year resolutions without realizing that a whole year has passed and we haven’t fulfilled our last year’s new year resolution which was based upon the failure of its previous new year resolution.
To sum it up: Another year is about to pass and another resolution is about to fail.
New year resolutions are like those government policies which are started but never completed and the benefits of which never reaches the public. For example, NREGA, Pradhan Mantri Jan Dhan Yojna and the award winning 3 time failure Ganga Action Plan. (Congress: Ouch!; NaMo: Ouch!Ouch!Shit!; Rajiv Gandhi:Mummy!)
Every year we make a resolution(s) which we pledge to follow from 2nd January, because 1st January is a public holiday, you know.
New year resolutions are one of the classic examples of the reign of procrastination in the modern era.
Why it is Useless.
Every New Year resolution has two phase: The Making phase & The Procrastinating phase.
The Making phase
This phase is where you desperately search for a new year resolution. Majority of people pick out their previously failed resolutions. Some clichéd resolutions are joining gym, start studying or completing unfinished novel or novels. After choosing the resolution everybody eagerly waits for the New Year to come as if it would change anything.
The Procrastinating Phase
The phase where all the dreams begin to shatter. Everybody is well aware that 1st Jan is a public holiday so 2nd Jan is considered as the most credible day to start with the resolutions. However, after a night full of boozing and raving or watching award functions (loners and old people do this) there is little capacity left to remember anything about the resolution until another December arrives. Most people take gym membership or buy a dozen novels but they’ll go to the gym or open the novel only when pigs will fly. So to sum it up, Procrastination and New Year resolutions are synonymous. :P
P.S.: My Resolution in 2015 was to join the GYM. I’ll join it tomorrow though. :P
Hence it is proved that New Year Resolutions are nothing but ventures to lure ourselves in a fictional world of perfectionism.
Open Letter to New Year Resolutions.
Dear New year resolutions,
You are Evil. You give people fake hope and fake enthusiasm.
Every Human Being.
In a nutshell, SAY NO TO NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS!
HAPPY NEW YEAR 2016 Folks.