Bruce Willis, Martin Lawrence And A Total Surprise Entrant : Here Are The 5 WORST Choices Who Could Play James Bond

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My reaction if Martin Lawrence becomes James Bond.

Bond girls, martinis, Aston Martins and tailored suits are the 4 key ingredients that make up the ideal 007 agent.

From Sean Connery to Daniel Craig, all the actors had their distinct style to the role of the MI6 super spy. You’ve heard of the best candidates to play the role after Craig but hey, there’ll always be the odd ones who just wouldn’t fit into this character.

On that note, we present to you the 5 WORST choices who could play the iconic character of James Bond .

5. Jason Statham :

With his fair share of crazy in the Crank series, his rugged yet sophisticated act in the Transporter franchise and his suave villain role in Furious 7, some would say he’d make a good Bond but with the grim accent, grimmer looks, grimmer-er style of dialogue delivery and his Ph.D in the resting bitch face look, I can’t imagine him ordering martinis saying “Bond. James Bond.” in the same iconic way.

OKAY. HOW ABOUT NO?
OKAY. HOW ABOUT NO?

Too macho and too hunky, Statham is a strict no no as the British spy icon.

4. Martin Lawrence :

Forget the suits, forget the cars.

This guy brings “Whoooossssaaaa!” to the table (remember Bad Boys?).

My reaction if Martin Lawrence becomes James Bond.
My reaction if Martin Lawrence becomes James Bond.

Where Idris Elba may be in running to become the first black 007, its anti-thesis would be Martin Lawrence. Occasionally funny and a slapstick humor connoisseur, Lawrence can tickle our funny bones but can’t possibly stop psycho villains single-handedly and tame their evil plans. Or look good in a suit. Or swoon ladies off their feet. Just, not do anything Bond-like.

3. Channing Tatum :

Good looks, check. Action, check. Style, check.

But does anybody ever take Channing Tatum seriously? I know I don’t.

Seriously, Channing. Stick to comedy.
Seriously, Channing. Stick to comedy.

After his stint in the Magic Mike and Jump Street franchise as the lead, he has shown that he can dance and be funny but he would be the most confused man-child portrayal of James Bond which is why the future X-Men man (He’ll be playing Gambit) makes up our top 3, for his lanky dialogue delivery, laid back comic timing and man-child looks.

2. Bruce Willis :

Whatchu lookin' at, you son of a....
The “Whatchu lookin’ at, you son of a….” look.

I know. If he sees this list, he’s gonna beat the s#%t outta me. Like he did with villains in Die Hard. And Die Hard 2. And 3. And 4.

Rugged, macho, repetitive, old and bald. And a mean belly poking out from his abdomen. Not in a million years, the guy who immortalized John McClane could play the role of James Bond with the “F%&k you. In your face.” attitude and a totally non-funny comic timing.

And now, FOR THE FINALE.

1. Matthew Perry :

AND THAT’S THE ONE YOU’VE BEEN WAITING FOR.

“The name’s Bing. Chandler Bing.”

He doesn’t have an advice, but you’d definitely be interested in his sarcastic comments.

Lanky, sloppy, funny to the core and a ridiculous expressionist – He’s the entire opposite of of what Bond exhibits. His career in the mainstream cinema didn’t take off much after FRIENDS, but either way, this is one guy whom I’d never expect climbing buildings and flying helicopters like it’s a walk in the park.

*FACEPALM*
*FACEPALM*

His awkwardness and sarcasm would be enough to subdue his mortal enemies.

So, there you have it, folks!

Our list of the worst 007 choices.

*Secretly hoping Michael Fassbender becomes the next Bond*


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