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Taliban Warns Its Fighters To Stop Acting Like Tourists

The fundamental(ist) way of life

In an extremely strange turn of events, the Taliban leadership finally took note of the ludicrous activities that their Fighters had started pursuing. In their eternal search for Jannah, the Fighters found their way into the cradles of urban civilization finding simple pleasures in amusement parks and gyms, to name a few.

To picture adults messing about in gyms without a care in the world is a visual that has only been pictured in an Adam Sandler movie. 

However, with the Taliban acquiring the reins of the government in Afghanistan, the fighters will now have to search for greener pastures for their entertainment. As it turns out, it requires a whole lot of suspension of ‘fun’ to become an official in a government. Unfortunately, the Taliban underlings were not made aware of that fact. 

Keeping Up With The Taliban

As the Taliban took over the Afghan government, the upper strata of the Taliban leadership got to work with their papers, pens and AK-47s, in structuring an Afghanistan of their reckoning.

However, this mindset did not specifically transcend well with the Taliban foot soldiers as they took to their infantile desires for fun. For the first time in decades, the Taliban were not found screaming death but having a normal day out with the entire insurgent family.

Their first stop was the amusement park and the entire group found a safe haven in the golden repository of what we know as the World Wide Web, or the internet. As Twitter bore witness to the foot soldiers letting loose in an amusement park, the frivolity and childlike wonder left everyone amazed, almost making everyone forget the dastardly acts that they had committed.

The road to paradise is filled with obstacles, or maybe that’s how it’s supposed to look. However, for the frolicking Taliban members, paradise was now lined with Bumper Cars and amusement park kayaks. 

Although the amusement parks provided them with much to gush about, much like every other bounty of life they are provided with, it ended up in flames. 

Repercussions of having fun in an amusement park; they engulfed it in fire

Thus, they finally ended up at the place one can sparsely imagine fully grown adult terror mongering men having fun in the Presidential gym.

In all certainty, this may seem like an extremely normal place to have fun in, depending on who you are asking. However, nobody in lieu of this millennia could have ever foreseen folks having fun in a way as could be seen in the viral videos.

Bearded men with AK-47s hanging from their backs, trying terribly hard to get a dumbbell up to their waists, while another pumps his chest to the zenith, is an image that nobody thought they needed but it is a visual that everyone deserves.


Also Read: Listicle: How Did The Taliban Manage To Get This Rich?


Taliban Is A No Fun Zone

Owing to the very recent emergence of numerous pictures and videos of rank and file Talibani soldiers making the most of the city life in Kabul, the Taliban leadership has reared its head towards them.

The new Defence Minister of Afghanistan, Mawlawi Mahmood Yaqoob, warned the soldiers of committing to such reckless behaviour and forgetting their primary objective. He stated;

“Stick to the tasks you have been assigned. You are damaging our status, which has been created with the blood of our martyrs.”

Yaqoob had also directed the soldiers to stop clicking selfies as they could compromise with the security of Taliban officials. With these pictures finding their way into social media platforms, Yaqoob stated that it may lead to the disclosing of their location and also, the activities they were engaged in.

Not surprising to see the Defence minister being not so pleased with the fighters; offices aren’t the best places for a selfie

Furthermore, he also addressed that the soldiers had started to give in to ‘haram’ activities specifically engineered by the Western ideological group and the previous American backed Afghan government. Taliban fighters are now prohibited from sporting shoulder-length hair, stylish clothing, and white high-top sneakers. Highlighting this concern, Yaqoob also said;

“This is the behaviour of the warlords and gangsters of the puppet regime. If we continue to act like this, God forbid, we will lose our Islamic system.”

Suffice to say, we probably won’t be seeing any more videos of the Taliban insurgents having fun. Possibly their only contribution in making people smile, however unintentional.


Image Sources: Google Images

Sources: Business Insider, The Tribune, India Today

Connect with the blogger: @kushan257

This post is tagged under: Dangerous, Pakistan, Taliban, Government, formation, Afghanistan, tense relations, battlefield, bi-lateral, positive relationship, stability, Shah Mehmood Qureshi, Kabul, Prime Minister, Imran Khan, Afghan delegates, Foreign Minister, stakeholders, war-torn, freedom of speech, rights, embassy, Pakistan International Airline, General Faiz Hameed, Chief, Inter-Services Intelligence, trouble-shooter, US,  Afghanistan, haqqani, haqqani taliban, taliban, taliban Afghanistan, selfies, taliban selfies, taliban amusement park, Afghanistan amusement park, Afghanistan gym, taliban gym


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