Breakfast Babble: ED’s own little space on the interwebs where we gather to discuss ideas and get pumped up for the day. We judge things too. Sometimes. Always. Whatever, call it catharsis and join in people.
One of the core aspects of a patriarchal society like ours is its deep-rooted misogyny. But what is even worse, is its internalization. Consciously or subconsciously, at some point in our lives, we all have witnessed internalized misogyny or misogynistic behavior displayed by women themselves against other women.
A classic example of an internalized misogynist I think would be George aka Georgina from The Famous Five who time and again demeaned femininity and hated being identified as a girl.
However, in real life especially in a country like India, this internalization of misogyny only gets worse.
Back in my plus two, there was a group of bullies – popular boys who would call people nicknames based on their physical attributes. They were a menace and I for some reason was their favorite target. Since my teens, I was slightly overweight and did not have a very “desirable” physique. But I was good at math.
Every math period they would giggle, pass lewd comments, and disturb me in every possible way, day in and day out (my friends didn’t have math so they were never around). But strangely enough, instead of protesting, the other girls watched the show with a face exhibiting the utmost satisfaction – as if it hid their own insecurities and made them feel superior.
Once as the boys were busy in their act, a girl with an air of utmost superiority spoke, “No offense but had you worked out a little bit, this would not have happened to you.”
“So being a woman you are gonna act cool by encouraging men commodifying and tormenting another woman for not having an hourglass figure for their visual pleasure! Pathetic,” I wanted to say.
This kind of victim shaming is not at all exclusive to high school but can be seen all around us. Your neighborhood aunties might reprimand you for wearing a crop top and a mini skirt but never say a word to the potential rapists passing lewd comments.
In every family function, I am told, not by the uncles but the aunties, that if I’m not slim enough I won’t find a good husband, as if finding a “good husband” is my life goal and my physique the only thing that defines me as a human.
It’s always a woman tormenting her daughter-in-law into believing that household chores and childbirth are her sole life goals, despite the fact that “saas bhi kabhi bahu thi”!
Is it patriarchy again that is to be blamed for women fighting each other instead of fighting for each other?
Source: Blogger’s own experience
Image Source: Google Images
Find the blogger: @ParomaDey
Feature Image designed by Saudamini Seth
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