By Ayushi Aggarwal
Parenthood is just as difficult as being a teenager, and probably more. As teenagers, our decisions are going to decide our lives, at least that is what we think.
But as parents, every decision you take is going to determine not just your life but the lives of those you love the most. There is no guide to be a perfect parent.
There are no go-to rules you should follow because every child is different and no single set of rules can do justice to your child’s needs.
But still, there are things that, as an 18-year old, I think you folks should talk about more often because we need it. Knowing that our parents understand us and that they have our back gives us immense courage to face anything that shall come forth!
1. Mental Health
Depression and anxiety are real. Accept it. So many of us are battling against depression and anxiety every day and the fact that we can’t even talk to you about it makes the battle far worse for us.
Sometimes, all we need is that you listen to us, understand us and most importantly stand by us. It would be a lot easier if we don’t have to hide our tears and mental breakdowns.
All we need you to understand is that no, we are not being dramatic and that no, it is not okay.
2. Our Dreams
We know you have a lot of expectations from us. And we know that you want the best for us. But we would love it if you put just a little bit of faith in us because we really can decide what is in our best interest.
For once, give us the chance to live our lives the way we want to and we promise, if nothing, we will be happy. We will live a life of no regrets. And isn’t that all you want in the end? For us to be happy?
We will love you for letting us take the lead of our lives. Is that too much to ask for? Just once, ask me if I want to do engineering or CA or MBBS. And when I say no, ask me what I want to do.
Let us get that degree in that not-so-financially promising course. Don’t talk to us to persuade us out of not doing what you want us to do. Talk to us to understand our perspective.
We know you are trying to protect us. But you are not protecting a bird by not letting it fly.
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3. Your problems and that financial crisis you are going through
For all those single moms out there, those sole bread earners of the family and those mothers who work at home all day just to hear that the food didn’t taste right, I love you. We love you.
We know you go through a lot. But please, don’t go through it alone. It is okay if you’re struggling to make the ends meet.
No, you’re not a failure if you can’t get us that new phone or if the salt wasn’t just right in the food or if you couldn’t make it to my annual college play. It is okay. You too are a human.
Don’t be so harsh with yourself just because you think we can’t take it. Please talk to us. We will understand. Please tell us when we hurt you. We know we are not perfect and nor do we expect you to be. Let’s just grow together.
4. Sex education and molestation
We know you think we never faced it. But that’s not true. So many of us did. Talk to us about it. No, it wasn’t your fault. No, you didn’t fail in protecting us.
But there is a place where you did fail.
You failed to tell us what it was when we needed to know. We were being molested and we didn’t know it. When we grew up and we came to know it through Bollywood and friends, you failed to win our trust so that we can tell you what happened to us.
You failed to share our trauma. When you told us our clothes were too short and provocative, you lost our trust. When you told us men do not cry, you took away our right to let all of it out.
5. Gender Roles
Now we know you were raised like this. But is it necessary that what worked for you will work for us too? Times have changed and it is never too late to re-raise yourself the right way. We millennials are doing that too.
You didn’t do a very great job in this field, to be honest. Sorry but not so sorry!
It is 2020 and we don’t follow gender roles anymore… Yes, bro can cook or be a stylist or like pink and Didi can ride the bike, play cricket and be a fauji!
Cooking is a life skill and not a woman’s job. Period. In 2020, nothing decides what we can and we cannot do, gender most definitely does not. Let’s get the 2020 vision, please?
We are fighting patriarchy.
It is ingrained in you as much as it is in us. We are unlearning and learning all over again. It would get way easier if you could join us.
The first rule is, repeat after me- EVERYONE IS EQUAL AND SHOULD GET THE RIGHT TO CHOOSE THEIR LIFE IRRESPECTIVE OF THEIR GENDER. Or anything for that matter.
Okay, this one might sound difficult but trust us it is not as difficult as it may seem. There is a very simple rule to it. NOBODY DECIDES THEIR SEXUALITY. And everyone has the right to identify themselves as who they truly are and not as what you want them to be.
Your kids who belong to the LGBTQ+ community are struggling extremely hard for something as meagre as acceptance! The least you can do for your kids is to talk to them. Hear them out.
Your kids should not feel rejected for something that is a part of their very existence. This world needs more colours. 2020 is not the era for black & white! We go rainbow! We choose pride!
In the end, we would just say that TALK TO US. We need your love, your acceptance, and your support more than anyone else’s in this world. If we have your back, we can conquer the world. And if we don’t have your back, we are first going to win that and then going to conquer this world!
Image Credits: Google Images