Fake Friendly Fridays is a section where we invite the current entertainment source of the country for a no-holds-barred interview with ED Times. We make sure they remember this interview, even though they never gave it as this is purely an imaginative piece. (Oh, how we wish this wasn’t!)
Still didn’t get it? Well, yeah, this interview is fake. I mean who’s got time to interview legends like Dhinchak Pooja, right?
So, hold your seats tight ‘dhinchuks’, here’s your very own sensational biggie, DHINCHAK POOJA.
ED: Welcome to FFF, Dhinchak Pooja.
DP: Oh, don’t call me Dhinchak Pooja, that’s only for my dhinchuks out there. Thank you for this interview, get my nimbu paani please. Swag wala nimbu paani mera, swag wala nimbu paani! *giggles*
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ED: *puzzled* Eh.. lemonade, sure. We are your fans too, such legendary songs in such a short time span. I am sure Anu Malik is proud. Speaking of Anu, are you guys related by any chance?
DP: Anu Malik? Oh my goddd, he was my inspiration. But I sing so well, he also became a dhinchukian. We are not related. I am a self-made singer. He is nothing in front of me. Why are you giving him publicity? I am famous and come here let me take a selfie.
*awkward posing for selfie*
DP: Selfie mene leli aaj! *winks*
ED: *traumatised* So, where do you get your golden lyrics from? ‘Swag wall topi’, ‘Daaru Daaru’, ‘Selfie mene leli aaj’? Such game-changing lyrics, where did you get this talent from? Here’s one of your videos for the audience to watch.
DP: I write my own lyrics. I was born full of talent. Lyrics are my story, music is my life. I feel these lyrics while writing. I am very close to all the lyrics of songs I have written. I take selfies every day, in a pout, in a fish face… I thought of making lyrics out of my lifestyle. Daaru is love, of course, “jo naa nache usko maaru” is based on real life incidents. “Swag wall topi” will always be close to my heart.
ED: Oh, real life huh? *puzzled* Why is swag wali topi close to your heart?
DP: Because when I first sang on a red light, someone came and gave me that topi with some coins in it. My first music award. *happy tears* When life gave me a topi, I made ‘swag wali topi’.
ED: Oh, right. *secretly wishing to throw head on a wall* So, um.. who are these co-actors in your music videos? Some great acting skills and dancing moves!
DP: Oh, I don’t know. I don’t do all these low jobs. My assistants do it for me. They cast actors, I just concentrate on my soulful music.
ED: *astonished* Oh, “soulful”? Where did you get this “soulful music” training?
DP: Oh.. please. I was born with a soul full of music. I am talented and I am famous… I..
ED: *cutting in between* We have someone waiting for you outside, he says you didn’t pay for your Uber Pool. *relieved*
DP: Oh, haan. Driver bhaiyaaa. *gets up takes selfie with the crowd* Everyone give me Rs. 10 each for this selfie and then I’ll perform for you.
*crowd throwing Rs. 2000 notes, running for life*
DP: Darru, Darru, Darru..
ED: *snatching Pooja’s mic* That’s enough for today’s headach… interview. Thanks for joining us Pooja, I hope you’re happy that your dhinchuks ran away.
That was the very melodious and sensational, Dhinchak Pooja for you.
Thank god that live performance by Dhinchak Pooja in Delhi was just a prank by a parody page because trust me, you wouldn’t have been able to tolerate some “soulful music” on concert speakers!
Picture Credits: Google Images