FlippED is an ED Original style wherein two bloggers come together to share their opposing or orthogonal perspectives on an interesting subject.
We’re back with FlippED!!
It has been a topic for unending debate whether strict parenting is a better or worse idea as compared to lenient parenting.
Read our bloggers’ take on the matter from both the sides of the coin and choose your side.
Strict Parenting Is Better
Having strict parents helped me differentiate wrong from right from early on and kept me from straying where I shouldn’t have.
– Blogger Rashmi’s perspective
Owing to obvious understandable reasons, strict parenting bears a bad reputation upon itself. Topping the list of reasons given against it is the one which says that strict disciplinarian parenting puts kids in cages, clips their wings and makes them reckless once the wings are given an opportunity to spread themselves.
The very term would paint upon the minds of several readers the image of a cane-wielding parent ready to exercise his/her weapon on the kid at the slightest misdemeanour.
But it isn’t really so. I’ve grown up under real strict parents, and I didn’t have a 24*7 dagger hanging around my neck. I support sensibly strict parenting as that is what has shaped me into the person I am today.
Shows The Right Direction While Warning Against The Wrong One
Strict parents, no doubt put neon flags on the wrong paths which shouldn’t be travelled. But, they also show the right direction for the children to walk on which would lead them to possible success.
Because strict parents keep fretting about the performance, the children naturally get in the mould of studying and internalise the need to study and perform well in studies.
Kids know that they are doing what is right and there is nothing that could go wrong. And in case something happens off the hook, they are assured it isn’t because of them and that they’d have their parents’ back.
Strict parenting draws a clear line between what behaviour is acceptable and what isn’t. Children then are able to differentiate between right and wrong, and themselves go on to become responsible individuals.
Completely Lenient Parenting Is Better
Lenient methods of parenting foster a healthy parent-child relationship and from it stems the growth of the child.
– Blogger Anjali’s perspective
I wasn’t a mischievous child so never experienced strict parenting methods being used on me. However, it is not that I haven’t seen strict parents scold and beating their kids and discipline them. These practices may have bad consequences.
We may think that strict parenting methods help children discipline themselves in the fear of scolding or at times even beatings. These methods, no doubt, make an impact on the children and make them obey parents and elders, however, this practice may have a long-lasting effect on the kids, which may not be good.
These strict practices may cause trauma to the child. These traumas may be in the form of rebellious thoughts, feeling of neglect, depression or a deeply instilled fear in the mind of the child which doesn’t let the child live a normal life like others, even after becoming an adult.
Lenient Parenting May Help More Than Strict Parenting
When a child is brought up by lenient parents, there is an element of understanding and explanations. Parents who follow a lenient approach often make their kids understand the unfavourable and long term consequences of their wrongful acts and impart moral education as well. This is something which has a good, long-lasting effect on the mind of the kid and he is likely to remember such teachings for life.
On the contrary, when parents are strict, this isn’t done in the right manner. The child may obey for some days or years in the fear of punishment however, he/she would never inculcate the moral influence attached to it.
Spoilt Parent-Child Relationship
As and when parents adopt harsher strategies to keep children in check, the children lose the connect they have with their parents. They tend to take the scolding and loud reaction of parents as a constant and after one point stop paying heed. They may also view parents as controlling figures rather than a companion.
We strongly stand against abuse in domestic households, between husband and wife. This is because both the spouses are equal in marriage and deserve humane treatment. The same should apply to children too.
When we consider a child in the womb as a child alive, then why deprive a living, breathing kid of humane treatment? Abuse in any form shall not be acceptable and the same applies in the case of children as well.
I am not saying that occasional scolding is bad, however, it should never become a regular approach.
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Sources: Bloggers’ Own Views
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