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If I had a time machine, I wouldn’t waste it travelling back and forth on frivolous things like stopping my younger self from wearing bell bottoms to my cousin’s wedding. No, I’d use it to fix some deeply rooted messes that define our chaotic, glorious, and occasionally frustrating life.
First stop: pre-colonial India, where I’d whisper into the ears of the kings, “Bro, stop fighting over whose peacock feather is shinier. The British are coming, and they’ll take your Kohinoor AND your (gold) biscuits.” Imagine the history books if we’d focused on unity instead of debating whose kingdom had the best mangoes.
Then, I’d travel back to the 1990s and convince policymakers to prioritize education over rote learning. Imagine a generation that wasn’t obsessed with memorizing the Pythagorean theorem but could apply it somewhere (like figuring out the shortest route in traffic). Maybe we wouldn’t have so many engineers wondering why they’re stuck coding apps instead of living their childhood dreams of becoming cricketers.
Fast forward to 2004, when a tiny trend called “coaching centres” was becoming a monstrous black hole of childhoods. I’d stroll into the first one and shout, “Let the kid play gully cricket, for god’s sake! He’s six. He doesn’t need to crack the IIT-JEE before his milk teeth fall out!” Maybe we’d have fewer burnt-out engineers googling “how to become a chef at 35.”
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Speaking of burning out, I’d pop into 2014 to hijack the first WhatsApp forward. Armed with a giant neon sign saying, “Don’t believe everything you read”, I’d march into family group chats and declare, “No, Nani, Bill Gates isn’t giving away money for clicking links, and yes, the moon landing actually happened.” Who knows? I might even save a few families from splitting over “veg vs non-veg” debates.
Back in Bollywood in the 2000s, I’d kindly ask filmmakers to stop romanticising stalking and toxic masculinity. Maybe if movies didn’t glorify harassing women, our society wouldn’t equate love with persistence and “no” with “try harder.” And while at it, I’d tell them to invest in actual storytelling instead of 300-crore CGI and 15-item songs.
And before my time-travel budget runs out, I’d fast-forward to the future to remind people that climate change is real. “Hey, you’ll regret mocking Greta Thunberg when your AC won’t work because the planet is literally on fire,” I’d say while handing out reusable bags and side-eyeing everyone who still buys bottled water.
So, if I ever do get a time machine, don’t expect me to pose with dinosaurs or hang out with kings. I’ll be busy fixing messes, one intervention at a time. Because honestly, if time travel can’t make life in India a little less absurd, what’s the point?
Image Credits: Google Images
Sources: Bloggers’ own opinion
This post is tagged under: Time Travel, Indian Life Problems, Bollywood Satire, WhatsApp University, Indian Education System, Climate Change India, Healthcare Crisis, British Raj
Disclaimer: We do not hold any right, or copyright over any of the images used, these have been taken from Google. In case of credits or removal, the owner may kindly mail us.
