Disclaimer: Originally published in June 2017. It is being republished since it still remains an interesting topic till today.
QuoraED! This is when we pick up a trending or interesting thread from Quora and spin a story around it.
Joey Tribbiani was definitely one of my favourites in F.R.I.E.N.D.S. for a long long time. Sherlock is another favourite and a hit amongst the youth!
What if these favourites of ours met? What would be the conversation like?
Well, we found a perfect Quora thread for it. The answers are absolute gold. You go, Quorans! Here, read the best of the lot:
1. Sherlock bumps into Joey on the sidewalk. Joey is running to shoot for “Days of our Lives” for which he is absolutely late and doesn’t see Sherlock and falls down with the bump.
Joey Tribbiani: “Dude, watch the sidewalk for incoming people.. DO you know who I am ?? I am….”
Sherlock: “You are an Italian. Also, an actor who is playing a male character with a female brain in “Days of our lives”, though I would also add that you lack a brain of yourself. You got late because you could not finish your peanut butter sandwich on time. You are a charmer and a sex addict – a lethal combination which makes you a complete lover for any lady you meet. You are insecure about the character you are playing because maybe you have been a character on the show before and were kicked out for some problem.. And your name is Joey!”
Joey Tribbiani:
Also read: What If Chandler Bing Was Siri? : QuoraED
2. Joey Tribbiani: “How you doin’?”
Sherlock: “What is it? Love or friendship?”
Joey Tribbiani: “What are you talking about?”
Sherlock: “Your eyebrows suggest you are an actor. But your outfit doesn’t indicate a high standard of living. Nor have I seen you in any TV show or movie (Sherlock is obviously not expected to know about ‘Dr. Drake Ramoray’ ). So, you are a struggling actor. Still, you are the happiest man I have ever seen. Humans attach happiness with emotions. So, which emotion is it? Love or friendship?”
Joey Tribbiani: “Both. I love my friends. Who doesn’t? Don’t you love your friends?”
Sherlock: “I don’t have friends.”
Joey Tribbiani: “What?”
Sherlock:
DUMDUMDUM.
3. If Joey from FRIENDS met Sherlock, the conversation between them would be something like this:
Sherlock: “I am a high-functioning sociopath. You can’t beat me at anything.”
Joey: “Sure! How about Rock, Paper, Scissors?”
Sherlock: “Fine!”
*Sherlock analyzes Joey’s probable outcomes. Joey’s face looks aggressive. He might throw a Rock. But no, Joey knows that I will be analyzing him. So he wants me to throw Paper. Because he will throw Scissors. So, I will throw Rock. Yes! Rock!*
Sherlock: “Rock!”
Joey:
Sherlock: “Whats’s that?”
Joey: “That’s Fire. Beats everything!”
Sherlock would be mildly amused at how stupid humans can be! He will be frustrated to see how Joey behaves, and Joey will be amused to see how brilliant Sherlock is. Slowly Sherlock would start liking Joey’s way of life. Joey will start teaching Sherlock on how to hit on girls!! And in the season ending, we can see Sherlock saying “How you doin’?”
4. Joey: “Hey look, those guys look British.”
Chandler: “Yeah, so?”
Joey: “We should go and talk to them.”
Chandler: “Why?”
Joey: “Because they maybe from LONDON BABY!”
*Chandler shakes his head, walks away. Joey walks over to talk to Sherlock and John.*
Joey: “Hi there, I don’t think we have met.”
Sherlock: “I don’t give interviews, go away!”
Joey: “Excuse me!?”
Sherlock: “If you want an interview, try my friend John here, he is the one who blogs, he is the one whose name you have probably heard.”
Joey: “I’m not here take your interview.”
*John and Sherlock share a look.*
John: “Then why are you here?”
*Joey realises that they are not interested in talking.*
Joey: “Let me tell you something mister, JOEY DOESN’T TAKE INTERVIEWS! For all I know, it’s you who should take my interview. (Sherlock starts examining him) You probably know me from the…”
*Sherlock interrupts.*
Sherlock: “Shut up now, don’t ruin the fun. You got your eyebrows done today. You also have a hint of makeup on your face, so you didn’t wash it off nicely and no one reminded you. So, John. Meaning?”
John: “Meaning you are probably not in a relationship right now, you don’t even have a flatmate who can tell you about the irregularity and your friend over there probably saw it but didn’t tell you just to have some fun. Not very nice is it?”
Sherlock: “You are finally learning John. But there’s more. The makeup? Why will you use makeup? You said something about being interviewed. So you consider yourself rather famous. Actor then, not Hollywood of course. Soap Opera.”
Joey: “Hhhheeeyyyy!”
John: “Don’t be offended. He is like that.”
Sherlock: “I also saw you eating. They way you were eating and given the peculiar combination of food that you ordered says you are a foodie. Also, you don’t share food!”
Joey: “Yeah that’s right. JOEY DOESN’T SHARE FOOD!”
Sherlock: “You have a diary in your shirt pocket which says, Estelle. Also a pen. So your agent died.”
Joey: “Wait, even I couldn’t figure it out at first, how did you?”
Sherlock: “SENTIMENT!” (Irene Adler appears, music plays).
John: “You seem a pretty puzzled person.”
Joey: “Hey, if you think you can say anything you want just because you have an awesome British accent. You can’t! Just so you know, I can do the British accent as well. It’s in my resume. Let me show you.”
Sherlock (to John): “Ready?”
John : “I am if you are.”
*Sherlock and John run out of the building.*
Joey: Hey! They didn’t even let me do my British accent. They are just like those directors at DOOL.
5. Joey goes to London for Ross’s wedding. He is near London eye.
Joey: “Hey, can you take a picture of London eye with “me”?”
SH: “Yes, Joey.”
Joey: “Thank you!”
SH: “You are looking so excited means you have come first time in London your accent is Italian but your English is fluent means either you are a professor or an actor.
These type of clothes suggests you are struggling and a bit womaniser. As your teeth indicate that you are a food lover.
And you have a pocket-sized thing in your pants, it must be a calculator (at that time pocket-size phone were uncommon). Why would one bring a calculator on his journey, that strongly says to me that you are poor at maths. AM I CORRECT?”
Joey: 
SH: “Idiot, I wasted my time.”
*SH leaves*
Joey: *after 5 minutes*
How did he know all this about me???
SO, HOW YOU DOIN’?
LOL, IT IS WHAT IT IS GUYS! *wink-wink*
Image Credits: Google Images
