February is called the month of love, but January, the month just before it, is totally the opposite. Every year, as festive lights fade and routines return, January earns an unsettling reputation as the “divorce month.”
Lawyers, therapists, and relationship experts consistently report a noticeable spike in separation inquiries just weeks after the New Year begins. One would think that the start of the year, and that too just a month away from ‘the celebration of love’, people would want to hold onto their relationships, but apparently, that is not the case.
It has gotten to the point where January is being called the ‘divorce month’ in many digital spaces. But why does January trigger these relationship breakdowns?
Why Is January For The Divorces?
January has been given the moniker of ‘divorce month’, especially by divorce attorneys and therapists, because it is during this time that a dramatic spike is seen in divorce filings.
According to a The New York Times (NYT) report, Susan Myres, president of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers and a divorce lawyer in Houston, believes that the phenomenon could have started in the 1970s and 80s.
This is the time when a lot of people from the baby boomers generation started to divorce, and a pattern was noticed that it mainly happened in January.
A Cosmopolitan report further states a University of Washington study that noticed how “monthly divorce rates over the past few decades found a 33 percent increase in filings in January.”
Divorce attorney Jackie Combs explains the reasoning behind this, saying, “The introspection that accompanies New Year’s resolutions can act as a powerful catalyst, which often prompts people to pursue significant changes in their lives, including within their marriages.”
Psychologists also point to the role of self-reflection and New Year psychology. January represents a symbolic reset. People reassess their lives, habits, goals, and emotional well-being. New Year’s resolutions are not limited to fitness or careers; they often extend to relationships.
Many individuals begin asking themselves difficult questions: “Am I happy?” or “Is this relationship helping or harming me?”, and “Do I want another year like the last one?”, when the answers are painful, breakups and divorces can follow.
Marriage and family therapist Carrie Ann Cleveland further adds, “The new year [provides] psychological permission [by] encouraging a sense of closure, renewed agency, and the motivation for long-avoided changes,” and how “People find themselves asking, ‘Can I survive another year like this?’ The holidays pause breakups; January permits people to act.”
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As per a Stanford study, heterosexual relationships are especially worse, with women seeking out a separation from their husbands after the holiday season due to the stress and weight of labour they carry over that time.
Cleveland commenting on this said, “Many women enter the holidays already emotionally exhausted, as they often carry the mental load of preparing for and executing the lion’s share of the holiday festivities.”
She added that, “For many women contemplating divorce, January represents permission, not impulsivity,” and how “January isn’t when women decide to leave; it’s when they finally stop negotiating with themselves to stay.”
Emily Pollock and Kelly Frawley, partners at Kasowitz Benson Torres LLP, speaking with Refinery29 in 2020 report also said, “We don’t necessarily see an influx of new clients in January, but it is common that clients who have been on the fence about whether to file a divorce action, or even start the discussion about divorce with their spouse, may use January as a starting point to move forward with the process.”
The reason for this, they explained, “It’s not uncommon for people to decide to commence divorce discussions in January as the start of a new year is, for many, a time of reflection of prior life choices and consideration of future goals — a time to evaluate how to improve on the things that are not working in their lives.”
Legal and practical factors also play a role in January, seeing a spike in divorce filings. Courts, law firms, and administrative offices often operate on reduced schedules in late December. Once they reopen fully in January, people who have already decided to separate finally have access to professional help.
This logistical availability reinforces the clustering of divorce filings early in the year, giving January its reputation, even if emotional decisions were made earlier.
Image Credits: Google Images
Sources: Forbes, The Economic Times, Cosmopolitan
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This post is tagged under: January, January divorce, January divorce month, divorce, breakup, relationship, relationship news
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