Every once in a while, we’ve found ourselves deciding “just five more minutes” only to end up being online for hours, half asleep yet unable to stop the doom scrolling.
We’ve all been there, staring blankly into what feels like oblivion, feeling oddly jittery and vaguely inferior. Social media promised us connection, happiness, and even a sense of belonging. Yet somewhere along the way, it has left us lonelier and more doubtful than ever before.
It’s ironic how we live in an age where being “connected” is as easy as breathing, yet somehow, we’ve never been more alone, more detached. As Renuka Gavrani writes in The Art Of Being Alone, “Why do you hate the idea of being with yourself so much that the time you spend with yourself is now considered as loneliness?”
It all stems down to social media. The ray of light of the modern age that was meant to bring joy, happiness, and connection has somehow successfully caged its users. This digital paradox lies in the heart of what experts call social media’s “happiness trap”.
What is the “happiness trap”, and how is social media causing it?
Happiness Trap is a term coined by Australian medical doctor and psychotherapist, Dr Russ Harris, in his book, The Happiness Trap: How to Stop Struggling and Start Living.
This study builds around the theory of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), an approach often used in the field of mental health, that helps people manage the stress and turmoil of life by accepting them rather than escaping or fighting them.
Experts now apply this theory with respect to social media, which often creates an illusion among its users to constantly stay engaged online in order to seek validation.
Social Media’s happiness trap refers to the vicious cycle where a constant engagement online through likes, comments, and endless scrolling, across various platforms designed to foster positive feelings and social connections, inadvertently results in feelings of anxiety, isolation and inferiority.
This, although curated to give us instant boosts of dopamine, the human body’s “feel good” hormone, leaves us feeling emptier over time. Not only does this affect humans psychologically, but has adverse effects on physical well-being as well.
According to a 2018 study conducted by the Indian Journal of Community Medicine on Social Media Usage and Health Status among Students Studying in Pre-University Colleges of Urban Bengaluru, almost 25.5% of users hooked to social media reported increased anger issues, alongside other concerns like disturbed sleep (26.1%) and strained eyesight (38.4%).
Every new notification gives a fleeting dose of dopamine that signals our brains to keep engaging. However, unlike genuine joy, these digital pings are short-lived and temporary, nudging us to chase the next hit, almost like an addiction.
The more we depend on social media for happiness, the less likely we are to experience it elsewhere, in the real world outside our screens.
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Research shows that frequent engagement with social media leads to a certain kind of dependency, common especially among teenagers.
According to a study conducted by the World Health Organisation (WHO) in 2024, more than 1 in every 10 adolescents, ages varying between 10 -19 years, have shown signs of adverse effects of social media, struggling to control their addiction towards it. It was also recorded that girls face higher levels of problematic sides of social media use as compared to boys.
The perfectly designed algorithm that idealises the polished versions of others’ lives, the perfect vacation, the booming startup, or a flawless body, intensifies feelings of social comparison and inadequacy.
In an interview with the New Indian Express, Dr Sushma Gopalan, Child Psychologist, Aster CMI Hospital, explains, “Prolonged exposure can lead to various psychological issues, including anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. Constant comparison to curated online personas often increases feelings of inadequacy and isolation.”
She also warns that excessive dependency on social media can lead to weakened social skills and offline connections.
According to India Today, psychiatrist Dr Rahul Chandhok from Lybrate notes, “People who use social media excessively tend to neglect personal life, suffer from mental preoccupation and escapism, have mood-modifying experiences and negative tolerance to any situation.”
This isn’t limited to teenagers alone; adults, too, fall prey to this insidious cycle, often relying on social media to escape from stress, anxiety, work pressure or personal turmoil. Maybe that’s why we get wary when the Wi-Fi is down, because the sound of silence seems so threatening in an era where we’re so consumed by the noise of reels and memes.
Are you trapped too? Warning signs to watch out for
In today’s digital era, the line between necessity and dependency is dangerously thin.
Before we know it, harmless scrolling turns into a loop we can’t seem to escape. Our attention gets hijacked by notifications, and our sense of self-esteem gets tied to likes, followers, escaping reality and chasing what others have.
So, how do we determine if we’ve crossed the threshold of healthy use to end up in shackles? Below are the common giveaways:
- Finding it difficult to focus elsewhere if you’re not on a social media app.
- Feeling unusually unsettled if you haven’t checked the engagement with a post.
- Preferring online interactions over real-life conversations.
- Constantly comparing your life to others online and feeling depressed about it.
- Blurring the line between reel and reality and making your mood and worth depend on what happens online.
If you are someone dealing with some or all of these, this might be your sign to break the chain. So, the next question that arises out of this is, is there an exit from this constant loop of unrealistic reality?
Redefining Happiness: What happiness really means
Happiness isn’t about social validation at all. It lies in the little moments, ones that people might often ignore in the quest for capturing the “perfect camera shot”. The little things that make us human – a warm cup of coffee, a quiet afternoon with no backlogs or maybe just a drive away from the chaos of the city.
The joy of life doesn’t revolve around the number of likes or shares on a social media reel or the number of comments on your favourite picture.
Paulo Coelho’s The Alchemist is the perfect explanation that the happiness we chase on the outside, in materialistic things, often lies within us.
To break free from social media’s constant illusion of happiness, experts suggest:
- Taking some time off from our devices to take in the real world around us.
- Understanding that comparison only deprives us of the joy of the small things in life.
- Realising that everything on social media is just a refined, polished version of reality.
- Being present because a camera might not capture the true emotions.
In a nutshell, breaking free from this happiness trap might not be an easy task, as it takes efforts to unlearn habits built around digital validation, but constant reminders that happiness is not a competition or a social media hashtag might help us reclaim a little bit of peace we’ve lost to the scroll.
Image Credits: Google Images
Sources: Hindustan Times, World Health Organisation, The Indian Express
Find the blogger: @shubhangichoudhary_29
This post is tagged under: Social Media, Effects of social media on mental health, happiness trap, mental health, social media causes depression, social media addiction, teenage depression, anxiety, online validation, digital wellbeing, happiness trap psychology, social comparison, mental health awareness, dopamine detox
Disclaimer: We do not hold any rights or copyright over any of the images used; these have been taken from Google. In case of credits or removal, the owner may kindly email us.
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Great insights!
this is absolutely so true