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MAGGI: The Noodle Returns

Disclaimer: All characters and events in this article are completely fictional and any resemblance to actual events is purely due to heavy MSG consumption.

The opinions expressed herein are of a religious maggi fan.

Parental supervision is recommended owing to sensitive issues.

No fur-bearing animals were harmed during the creation of this article, only two cannon balls and a torpedo shot, but that’s it.

The content in this vignette is not intended to malign/ hurt the sentiments of anyone, in case of any objection have Maggi.  

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Your most approachable, ‘maggical’, partner for a dime, the saviour in ill-timed pangs of hunger, sabki favourite Maggi is in the soup.

This article is a mere catharsis of the irrepressible joy on the return of maggi from exile.  

Enjoy.

Maggi: The noodle Returns  

Like any father, Nestle harboured high hopes from his ever-doting son, Maggi.

*Papa kehte hain bada naam karega, beta humara aisa kaam karega*

Maggi made a place in every heart and stomach, from a 6-year old’s tiffin to a 60-year old’s cheat meal. College students swear by it, penniless hostelers hog on it, you can easily pull an all-nighter with it, your boyfriend knows how to cook and it’s become every child’s staple food. Be it home alone or buddies at home, maggi will always be the easiest and the most economical bet.

The story of maggi is rather emotional.

JAB WE MET: 

Falling head over heels for the least demanding (2 minutes) lover, a partner through thick and thin, the audience committed to a life-long relationship with it. Acquiring knowledge of the indubitable love, Nestle approved of their relation.

EK VILLAIN:

Envious of the 32-year lengthy love affair, Mojo Jojo (here, FSSAI) decides to put an end to it.

Mojo jojo is maggi’s rival back from school who used to be bullied all his school life. Clad in a leather jacket, on a bullet, he pulls out a rusty knife and passes a sinister grin. *thunder and lightning strike* He holds an age-old grudge against maggi and is all set to make him bite the dust. What was only a childhood shenanigan, snowballed into a nightmare.

 

MAGGI MMS:  

Maggi is stalked and alleged to have illicit relations with his ex-girlfriend, MSG and publicly shamed. Having his integrity questioned amidst the nation, people are boiling with hurt and anger; feeling heartbroken and cheated. The whole of India reverberates with clamour and criticism.

Maggi is put behind bars (here, Central Laboratory ). Working moms have a hard time in the morning, hostellers crave for midnight snacks, children reminisce the time spent with Maggi, slumber parties have lost the spirit, canteen menu looks dull, teenagers miss their break-up buddy, relatives and aunties are back to questioning our cooking skills. Every soul realizes the importance of their taken-for-granted companion, Maggi.

The internet is inundated with miss you Maggi messages and people shed tears in nostalgia.

Constantly fighting to prove its innocence, Maggi lost all hope. Our poor friend lay in the dirt, blood smeared and dejected.

FIR BHI DIL HAI MAGGISTANI:  

Unable to stand any atrocity, it harnessed Indra, The Tiger’s energy to get back on it’s feet and defeat the villains.

It was soon proved that the MSG racket was a conspiracy and Maggi and audience’s true love was brought to light. Seeing the intensity of their love, the cops relent and freed Maggi on parole. And they lived happily ever after.

After all, itni shiddat se humne tumhe paane ki koshish ki hai, ki har zarre ne hume tumse milane ki sazish ki hai.

*Curtains fall*

All our childhood memories have one thing in common. Those trips to hill stations, pouncing on your best friend’s tiffin at school, the birthday cake wali maggi and mom-is-sick so-i’ll-cook-for- myself wali maggi, paneer maggi, chicken maggi, chai with maggi, coke with maggi, everybody has had a maggi moment to cherish.

Ban on maggi has been lifted in the country and your one true soulmate is back.

Share stories of your tryst with Maggi and make it stay.

Graphic Credits: Abhinav Jain

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