By Pankaj Rawat
Donald Trump the most loved President in American history, err… yes the most loved especially among American Press has promised to put America first in each and every domain by hook or crook.
He doesn’t believe in International democratic organizations because hey he knows that all these organizations are getting their finances from Uncle SAM.
But guess what, second World nations have already started treading for the second place.
Netherlands, a European nation who gave asylum to Anne Frank has now requested America to put them second by a quirky video they posted on 23 Jan by their local media network.
Netherland has frankly imitated Trump’s voice, criticized Spanish people, loathed majority of European languages just to prove their loyalty towards Mr. Trump because newly elected president owns the beautiful characteristics of Hate, Anger, misogyny, racism and most important being foul mouthed.
But I don’t think these European countries’ efforts are going to appease Mr. Trump, because he loves to be patronized and we Asian people are best at it.
India’s bid to become second
Though we Miffed Uncle Sam in past by resorting to foolish NAM concept, but we realized our mistake and leveraged our economy in back 90s’ to welcome America’s capitalistic neo-imperialism. We signed a nuclear deal in back 2008 and are making continuous efforts to normalize our relations with them. Mr. Trump is our guy, He loves India, He loves Modi and he even copied our PM’s slogan.
Ours video aptly puts our characteristics, some of them even find their mention below
Love for English and embarrassment for our Indian languages
We are one of the major nations, who have so many languages, but still we love English, we love it so much that we developed our own version which is “HINGLISH”. We love imperialism, that’s in our blood. You mocked about our accent; we are working hard to even improve it.
Best pussies in World
We have best pussies in world, we have made one of them as our national animal but Mr. Trump you can’t grab them by p***y. Beware!
Combination of cock and Pussies
We have our national bird which is cock, err… not cock it’s Peacock. The combination of Pussy and cock you will love it.
We are racist, we don’t like blacks even we ourselves are browns
We are big racist; our matrimonial ads show that, our love for Fair and Lovely is immense, so immense that we consider it as a yardstick of success. We know you love white complexion.
We are good at walls; we built Himalayas
We know you love walls; we know you don’t like Mexicans. We don’t also like Chinese, they are shrewd and very clever but our Himalayas put them at our arm’s length. We even didn’t pay for it.
We have cheapest techies in the world
We have cheapest techies in the world, we do your work, and we are even doing hard to improve our American accent. Please leave alone the topic of H1B visa.
If we are here, how can Pakistan be left behind!
Mr. Trump Please don’t get swayed with the Video of Pakistan, they have made a disaster. Let me decode you this innocent country’s claims.
Major Non-Ally NATO Status(MNAS)
They are not your allies, they are scumbags, they use your assistance for terror funding, they create crisis themselves and then use NATO’s money to manage it. Certainly it feels the NATO’s objective of using this union for crisis management, but does it count fake crisis meant to sabotage other countries.
Stupid and crooked politicians
They are not stupid; they are clever and loyal to their army. They have inherited the most pious genes which are deception, cowardice and selfishness.
Do not forget Sir, they hid the jewel of your crown Osama Bin Laden. Bin Laden felt safe in Pakistan, this proves they are the safest country of the world since it has the capacity to arrange safe accommodation of world’s deadliest terrorists.
They see themselves between 1st and 2nd
Well don’t get mistaken, they are counting them among world’s most deadly countries. They are jostling to be at top there. So Mr. Trump please give them the recognition of the deadliest country of the world so it could attract new ventures from startups of terrorist and criminal world.
Mr. Trump, Hope you will understand, that India is your best partner and we patronize you for your bravest acts. Your ban on Muslim nations is a welcome step to make this world more venomous and you know we love venom even World’s most venomous Snake King Cobra loves to live in India. Hope you will put us at NO. 2.
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