“A romantic relationship between an introvert and extrovert is like an attempt to join two extremes like two north poles or two south poles. The level of repulsion is unparalleled.” ~ Yogita Rathore.
So, I am an introvert. To start talking on why I think an introvert and an extrovert cannot sustain a relationship, I want to highlight a few qualities of introverts. Introverts gain energy from spending some “me time” every now and then and there are times they lock themselves up and it’s perfectly normal.
Now, here’s the thing: the whole idea of opposites attract can only work in movies! In reality, you might get attracted to your opposite but once the “honeymoon period” ends, it’s going to be downhill from there.
Your extrovert partner would want you to meet his/her family, friends etc. He/She would want you to accompany him/her to parties, social gatherings etc. and you’ll hate doing that. After a point it’ll deplete you to such an extent that you’ll regret your decision.
Similarly, an extrovert always wants to talk things out, that too as soon as possible while introverts need time to process and function. This stark difference between the personalities will again lead to fights and clashes!
Those days when you’d want time for yourself, your extrovert partner is going to be super hurt and feel like they’re doing something wrong. Or they’ll take it as a subtle hint of you wanting to end things. This will take a toll on your introverted self.
Sooner or later, you’ll be judged as “being difficult” and your relationship will take a toll on other spheres of your life. You’ll long for solitude more than anything and you’ll be repelled by your partner so much that it’d drive you insane.
So basically, my point is that a stark difference in personality type isn’t really a good sign for sustaining a relationship, especially when introversion or extroversion comes into the picture. Sooner or later, nothing but differences in personality itself destroy the relationship and further your own sanity.
Having said all this, I’ll still say that just because the odds are against the common norm, it doesn’t mean that out of 100 extrovert-introvert relationships, all 100 fail!
At the end of the day, things work out if you want them to. So, don’t worry!
“Last time I checked, opposite poles do attract. So why the drama when it comes to 2 different personalities?” ~ Sahib Singh.
Being an extrovert, I’ve always been very open about my feelings and my state of mind. I tend to explore my surroundings from time to time, looking for new challenges.
My introvert counterpart may need her time to deal with things but that’s not how I function. She may go into a shell or be totally unsociable, she may be insecure or she may be even passive-aggressive at times, Lord knows what else. But is that really a defining point of sustenance of a relationship?
The entire generation of millennials is regarded as a revolution because we look past the differences in personality and embrace the real person beneath, taking time out to notice and getting to know them and trying to understanding their perspective of things.
Which is why I believe that these two opposite personalities can perfectly co-exist in a romantic relationship because it’s all about maturity and clarity and not about the gooey shit that they show you in movies.
If a person knows his partner’s personality type, his tendencies, his quirks and his ability to make decisions, the relationship will be smoother than a heated knife on butter.
Furthermore, the most important part of an “opposites attract” type of relationship is the opportunity of learning and exploration.
Keeping romance aside, the two personalities have so much to learn from each other ; where the extrovert can help his partner to overcome social awkwardness, the introvert can help his partner when it comes to introspection and critical observation of one’s surroundings.
The extrovert can induce freshness and make an effort to chuck out negativity from his partner’s life because of the former’s enthusiasm whereas the introvert can teach his partner about the importance of privacy and maintaining a definitive circle of trust due to their reserved persona.
Sure, the odds are high that there will be petty disagreements over lots of things but in the long run, you get to experience a completely different side of life through your partner and that’s an experience worth trying once.
So to all the opposites out there, hang on and give it your best shot!
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