8 Things That Might Happen If Bobby Jindal Became POTUS

The incumbent 55th Governor of Louisiana, Mr. Bobby Jindal, is running for the office of the President of The United States. While his name is suggestive of his Indian roots, in reality he’s about as Indian as George Bush eating a Hot Dog while riding a Bald Eagle. Not that it means there won’t be much talk in India about him becoming President.

Born to an immigrant family, his father was a Civil Engineer (Not Surprised). After school, he quickly rose through the ranks to become one of America’s brilliant young minds. He also adopted Christianity along the way, which was certainly instrumental in his getting majority in a conservative state.

While the media focuses solely on Mr. Donald Trump and his numerous shenanigans, and Bobby Jindal’s polling numbers don’t seem too hopeful, a situation where Mr. Jindal became the President of the USA would be interesting to say the least.

At the risk of employing stereotypical liberties, here are 8 things that would happen if Bobby Jindal came into power as the POTUS.

  1. India would suddenly embrace his Indian-ness.


Seeing that Mr. Jindal becoming the first Indian American Governor in the United States didn’t confer on him Sunder Pichai and Satya Nadella levels of national adulation, perhaps his occupying the most powerful office on the earth will.

  1. Call Centre Employees in India would be given an American Citizenship.


‘Hello, my name is Bobby. How may I help you?’

  1. Brown University, his alma mater, is to have reservation for Indians.


Does no one else find it funny that an Indian went to Brown University?

  1. Narendra Modi’s ascension to power will probably be overshadowed.


Started from the bottom, now we here.

  1. The slow demise of Hot Dogs, the rapid rise of Gol-Gappas


Americans will be asking for that extra Pani-Puri before they know it. Talk about soft power.

  1. Baseball will be modified just enough so that it is exactly like Cricket.


To be fair, that’s probably Strike 1.

  1. Broadway Musicals will remain the same; will be forced to pay royalty to Bollywood.


Also, one item number for each stage show. That is the norm.

  1. Wharton and Harvard University to have classes on how Consumption of Pan Paraag and Rajnigandha results in massive success.


The success part is mainly for the manufacturers of the aforementioned substances.


To conclude, while the chances of Bobby Jindal winning the Republican ticket are about as much as Sachin Tendulkar taking up Advanced Martial Arts, we do wish him the very best in life, and humbly hope that Donald Trump doesn’t confuse him for a Mexican.


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