Mysteries Decoded

By Alisha Dewan

dilemma

A big dilemma. That is what I found myself amidst when I had to choose from eleven categories to write for Economy Decoded. Technology, sports, music and cars are not really my cup of ‘chai’. I follow politics and international relations very closely, but that’s not something I would like to write on. Fashion is closest I could get to, but al final I decided to write about the 6 things that have always fascinated me and have kept me pondering in the 18 years of my existence.

6) Why does the metro run late on that very day when you’re already late for college? That feeling when you see the metro doors shut in front of your eyes as it rushes past you, while you run for your life and climb the station stairs feels like a hundred knives stabbing you in the chest. It’s like when you’re already running late, every force in the world tries to deter you further. The queue that you join is the one that moves the slowest, you get a red light at every crossing, and oh…..well you get my point.

5) It’s just me or do trial room mirrors really make your face look ugly and your ass look big in everything you wear? Well, if they used flattering mirrors that made everybody look like Angelina Jolie, I’m pretty darn sure there would be a spurt in the contribution of the garment sector to the GDP like never before.

4) Why is the most scrumptious, the most delectable food, fattening and calorie packed? Well, see for yourself, there are no exceptions! And the pangs of guilt one faces every time they decide to treat themselves to a huge tub of ice-cream? Inexplicable! Imagine a world in which chocolate was diet food and broccoli was fattening. I’m sure in such a scenario, the world would have been a much, much happier place.

3) Why is every swear word something filthy about your mother or your sister? Nobody really says tera baap and bhai, nothing like fatherfuc*** exists in English, there isn’t a male equivalent to the word ‘slut’ and so on. People might suggest ‘Playboy’ and ‘Casanova’, but hello!, It’s nothing close to derogatory. In fact men might consider it a flattering compliment. We have become so immune to these misogynistic statements that they have entered our vernacular and we use them without giving much thought. And well, every time someone says “grow a pair of balls” it only makes one feel like kicking them!

2) We harp about love being timeless, unconditional, pure….yada yada, then why do break-ups and divorces happen? Double standards, anybody?

1) Where is God when 2.54 million women are raped every year? Where is God when 3.1 million children die of hunger annually? And where is God when 5.26 million people lose their lives each year just because they are poor?

Answers, anyone?

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